Failing Forward with the Enneagram: Awareness Is the First Act of Leadership

Most of us think leadership begins with action.

Fixing the problem.
Making the decision.
Moving things forward.

But real leadership—especially the kind that lasts—begins somewhere quieter.

It begins with awareness.

Not awareness as self-criticism.
Not awareness as over-analysis.
But awareness as honesty.

The kind that says: “This is what’s happening inside of me.”

That is where failing forward actually starts.

Failure Isn’t the End — It’s the Signal

When people hear the word failure, they often think of outcomes:

• The relationship that ended

• The role that didn’t work out

• The decision that backfired

• The season that fell apart

But failure is rarely the problem.

What we do after failure is.

Without awareness, we repeat patterns. We react instead of respond.
We double down, shut down, or disappear.

With awareness, failure becomes information.It tells us where we tighten.
Where we brace. Where we abandon ourselves trying to survive.

That’s where the Enneagram becomes a powerful tool—not to label us, but to reveal us.

The Enneagram Isn’t About Personality — It’s About Patterns

The Enneagram doesn’t tell you who you are.
It reveals how you learned to protect yourself.

Especially under stress.
Especially after failure.
Especially when leadership feels heavy.

It shows us:

• How we react when things go wrong

• What we believe we must do to stay safe

• Where our strengths turn into liabilities

• And what growth actually looks like—not in theory, but in practice

This is why the Enneagram is so valuable in seasons of transition, burnout, grief, rebuilding, or reinvention.

Because leadership under pressure doesn’t reveal character—it reveals patterns.

And patterns can be interrupted.

The Three Centers of Intelligence

One of the most important foundations of the Enneagram is understanding the three centers of intelligence:

• Body (Instinct) Center – Types 1, 8, 9
  Concerned with control, autonomy, anger, and presence

• Heart (Feeling) Center – Types 2, 3, 4
  Concerned with worth, image, identity, and connection

• Head (Thinking) Center – Types 5, 6, 7
  Concerned with fear, safety, trust, and certainty

Each center processes failure differently.

Some tighten.
Some perform.
Some overthink.
Some push harder.
Some disappear.

None of these responses makes you weak. They make you human.

Awareness allows you to notice which center you lead from—and what it costs you when it’s running unchecked.

Awareness Shortens the Time We Stay Down

Failing forward doesn’t mean avoiding the fall.

It means you don’t stay on the ground longer than necessary.

Awareness helps you catch:

• The moment you turn failure into self-attack

• The moment responsibility turns into self-erasure

• The moment strength turns into control

• The moment peace turns into avoidance

For me, as an Enneagram One, awareness looks like noticing when:

• Responsibility becomes rigidity

• Integrity turns into self-criticism

• “Doing the right thing” costs me my nervous system

Without awareness, I burn out trying to fix everything.
With awareness, I can pause, soften, and choose a different response.

That pause is leadership.

Leadership Starts With Self-Leadership

You cannot lead people, organizations, families, or futures you are not willing to lead yourself.

Self-leadership means:

• Noticing your internal pressure

• Understanding your default reactions

• Taking responsibility without self-punishment

• Choosing regulation over reaction

The Enneagram doesn’t excuse behavior.
It explains it—so you can take ownership instead of staying stuck.

That’s failing forward.

Faith, Awareness, and Becoming

From a faith perspective, awareness is not self-obsession—it’s stewardship.

Scripture consistently invites reflection:
“Search me.”
“Renew your mind.”
“Be transformed.”

Awareness allows us to cooperate with growth instead of resisting it.

It helps us see where God is inviting healing.
Where rest is required.
Where growth is possible.

Not by force.
But by truth.

Failing Forward Begins Here

If you take nothing else from this:

You don’t need to eliminate failure to grow. You need to become aware of how you respond to it.

Awareness doesn’t prevent the fall—but it shortens the recovery.

And leadership that begins with awareness creates movement that lasts.

This is the heart of Failing Forward.
Not perfection.
Not performance.
But becoming—on purpose.

Until Next Time~

Keep Failing Forward,

Janita Faye